Yes, it's true. 4 fingers.
I think taking a nice shit is a lot more satisfying than an orgasm. This is probably why I'm single.
you ran into the room and announced "I JUST FUCKED HER IN THE ASS". apparently you forgot she left the bedroom 5 minutes before you and was standing with us all.
I'm so hungover even the car commercials make me nauseas
I literally stabbed myself so I had a valid reason to get out of having sex with her
I hope his life after cheating on me is as good as Tiger's golf game is these days.
It didn't get weird until she took off her underwear, looked down, and said "fill her up!"
I've been thinking about it and if we ever have a threesome it'll start off with us clothed solely in our matching fur vests
It's take your daughter to work day... I really shouldn't be here right now
The length of my leg hair is a constant reminder of how long it's been since I even thought I had a chance of getting laid.
It's not that I even wanna fuck these guys anymore, just cuddle that's all. My conscience has never been so proud.
Some girl is sitting topless in the kitchen and having a Skype video chat with some guy. I already like it here.
Immediately after sex he layed on the floor and acted like my yellow bra was pac man
How hard do you think it would be to make a drinking game out of a Slip-N-Slide? Asking for a friend.
I swear to god, I'm like....the Jedi master of dick.
Randomize
