awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
The more I sober up, the more sick I am/realize how weird dancing around a wine bottle was
He said he wanted to have kids with me so they could grow up to be professional linebackers. Not. A. Complient.
I just remember taking her cat for a walk around 3 am then falling asleep in a slide at the park
If i need to get strippers involved i will.
Just saw a 300lb woman fall down. Shes screaming like a beached manatee. Her 120lb boyfriend is trying to push her up. It's like watching an infant try to bench
you were trying to control your nosebleed while having someone hold your four loko while you drank it through a straw. all at the same time. that is commitment.
I'm still hoping for it dude. Random north dakota pussy. If my 16 year old self knew that these were my dreams he would so try to beat me up, and i think he could.
She found my wedding ring, sallowed it and wished me good luck explaining it to my wife before walking out. Now what?
i told myself when i was 16 i would never fuck an Alan. now i've fucked 3 and i'm punching my 16-year-old self in the face
sooo the guy I beat last night in strip pong is the manager's husband at my new job...
I can't ever look his wife in the eye again. She will see right through my soul to his dick pic.
I was just asked by a police officer to not come back to Lancaster...
Hey. You got pizza and sex. How much more can you ask for?
You think my vibrator will be okay in the dishwasher?
Randomize
