Well I don't think you could recreate that hangover if you tried. It was like the perfect storm of hangovers.
I don't care where my tongue is but i t's going to be in all the pictures.
just had sex in his gielfriend's bed, and puked all over it. i need to get out of here.
All I wanna do is sit in water and get drunk. The only thing more American is giving birth to eagles.
well he's currently spooning the coffee table
I just want you to know that i just realized your the only friend i dont feel fat around.
Of all the things I am low enough to do, how could you even doubt if that was one of them?
you have failed as an in class drinking partner.
Did you take the bag w/your drugs & cookie cutter?
I told my boss that I'm in a slutty stage of my life right now and the chef overheard and slipped me his number. I might get laid tonight
I woke up with my earring stuck inbetween my tits. Somehow you fucked my earring out and my boobs saved it. I'm pretty impressed with both of us right now.
I should not be allowed to reproduce. The world doesn't need my sarcastic asshole demon spawn in child form
I bet your mom's never met a girl who's thrown up at the presidential inauguration before though.
I sent him a topless photo and he complimented my eyes. I'm not sure if I'm offended or pleasantly surprised.
he's fucking insane. he's worse than me. is that even possible? I'm only with him because his dick is huge. I need Jesus.
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