I cant watch the real world now after jersey shore. its like trying to go back to vagina once uve had anal
U shoulda just taken her to a stall and banged her and let me watch the game. Some friend u r.
For my 21st birthday, I require a kiddy pool filled with vodka. Make it so.
I just went to pick up my pigeon from your house. You should be getting a picture soon
I'd like to introduce you to my friend, Moderation. Enjoy each other's company this weekend.
Your friend and I already don't get along
Turned on my GPS and all that it said in the search bar was "beer,"
Think of where it's been though. That Dr. Suess book, "Oh the Places You'll go" was written for his penis.
We picked up some guys dressed as shamrocks at taco bell. I will text you with further information.
It was fun, but I mean, any day that starts with shower tequila is bound to be good.
I don't know what that means. But if you take off your pants, you'll probably get arrested.
So I just sneezed blood everywhere. On the upside. After yesterday I feel way more confident AND I give even less of a fuck.
God it's like my stomach is full of drunk bees
I've finally given up enough on finals week to wear the same shirt three days in a row, because I didn't take my hoodie off for the first two.
She's hot and all. It's just I don't want to become Eskimo brothers with my sister
You know I've done a lot of messed up stuff. But I never thought I would have to put a bandaid on my dick. Yet here we are.
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