just cut a line with my blood donor card...i feel like it will help remind me that i was once a productive member of society.
So one buddy got tackled at the urinals by national guard members and was arrested. Another had sex in a port o potty with possibly the drunkest girl I've ever encountered. The rest of us blacked out and won a few bets. So yes, the derby did meet our expectations.
I just ate nachos topless with a fork. Live with meeee
well right now he's telling us a story how he befriended a racoon
had to split buying plan b over two cards. I will no longer challenge people to get on my level
in my lab write-up should i mention that i watered my plant with tequila?
I'm thinking he has to buy me dinner at least twice before i even start considering casting him for "Fuck buddy - understudy."
I'm sorry, but the "Hobbit Slam" has to be a sex move.
Ya I don't think I'm going anywhere, a cum towel, beer, and Vicodin was just exchanged in our white elephant present game
I bet his dick wears a tuxedo.
Do you think I shall pursue this journey to the center if the dick?
As I was balls deep, she moaned "i can't wait to see what how hot our daughter will be". Instant de-boner
Your mankini haunted my dreams.
I butt dialed her mom while cheating on her. Needless to say Christmas will be awkward.
Not gonna make it. His stripper neighbors are playing a Super Bowl drinking game that involves removing my clothes
Randomize
