I fucking hate vegan toaster pastries. You don't fuck with poptarts. It's like baseball...it's the backbone of american sport and you don't change it. Poptarts are the backbone of american fatasses and you don't just go changing them.
i just bought ciggarettes using my court citation as id. I've reached an all time low.
i was concerned by what you said you would do for a snickers. It wasn't even a Klondike bar.
When She took off her bra.... A tube of lipgloss, her phone, I.D. And a wad of twenties fell out.... I'm officially no longer a butt man
When that rick ross song came on he started ripping up dollar bills and pouring out drinks on the floor. I'm all for ignorance but it was a little excessive for a wedding
He just kept screaming "I have democratic immunity" as the cops dragged him into the car.
You know how I got mad at him for making out with his formal date? Apparently I fucked mine. I'm guessing any exclusivity is out of the question.
I think I threw my underwear away at What-A-Burger last night.
You need to fuck him. The man has his own Wikipedia.
I thi k this dude I fcken showed up to the bar in a raisins shirts. I thought I was better than that. Fuckkkk.
Ok spinning in the opposite direction thatg the room was spinning was the worst advice ever
Do they mail horrible human being awards or do I have to pick it up or what's the protocol on that shit
There's something really beautiful about walk of shaming past the Capitol.
I realize my mistake but don't you dare school me in cock, young man
For now I'm a single mom monday-thursday and a drunk looking for dick the rest of the week
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