she had the hairiest bush ive ever seen. it looked like a spoiled head of lettuce.
dont ever smoke after you drink again... i dont think ive ever seen...or heard of someone throwing up and farting at the same time. that is, if you were farting.
i forgot to tell you that olivia sent me a text yesterday that the mormon girl got caught with weed in her vagina at school
It's a big world.....someone has to fuck it.
I'm in his phone as "nashville blowjob" he also has "cleveland blowjob" "vegas blowjob" etc. i'm okay with this.
The other. Cat spoke to me and left. This shit is laced
The first cat might save me but they are taking out masks
How can I explain how nice he is to you? ...like, I'm going to have to have my world famous why being a douche is sexy talk.
Somehow he made it really romantic
He came on your tits... That doesn't scream romance to me.
You said you couldn't look at me because you would have to take off your sunglasses but you can't because they're the "guides to your eyes".
Mate, you pissed in my bed. Then told me to "Just keep swimming"
I find him attractive in the absolute weirdest way. Like I need him to do my taxes, but I also feel like I should spill things on him to gain his attention and then lick it off to gain his affection.
Let go out that Thursday night!
Yess sounds good, I have to go turn myself in the next day because what happened last Friday.
He shit in the fireplace
Pretty sure I scared her away last night by putting a vodka tampon in my ass
dude if looks could fuck you two would've been naked in front of everybody
Randomize
