Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
i just shoved 27 marshmallows in my mouth
well thats a nice change of pace from what you normally put in your mouth
Actions speak louder than words. Her actions scream crazy.
why is it whenever you puke in the park there are always little kids on the swings?
He snuck into some random hotel's continental breakfast at 3 AM and then passed out on a bench in the lobby. When the cops found him they made him empty out his pockets. No phone, no ID just muffins.
I remember saying "sorry" to the blunt before throwing it out the window
Is sexting at a funeral morally wrong?
I woke up to him eating cereal out of my viking helmet with a shot glass. No idea where he got the milk.
then they caught me trying to hide the turtle in the fridge
This is just what we do. We meet guys, go back to their place, smoke all their weed & go home to compete in out own version of Cupcake Wars.
I really have a thing for Greek chicks; I feel like while we are having sex she has the ability to make hummus which is just too appealing for me to pass up.
Do you understand how hard it is to go down on a guy underwater? Didn't think so....
Company sent me first class out of state, got so drunk on the plane I started handing out pillows and blankets to the people in coach
So, just saw a lady hysterically sobbing in a Walmart at 3 AM. Someone's not having a happy mother's day.
So... In conclusion, do I bring my vibrator and risk not only having it getting taken out at security, but also exposing my dad to my neon green vibrator, or just leave it here?
Randomize
