Please advise as to how precisely ashamed I should be if I just became sexually aroused by a Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince preview
I had to go to the bank to confirm purchases made on 10/31/09 because they were signed as Lady Gaga
i've never heard her scream louder than when the koreans scored. what am i lacking in bed?
Can I have my ID back now or are you using it to crossdress again?
we drunkly made out in the middle of the street beside the homeless guy playing the flute. Not how I imagined our first kiss.
You will not judge me for my made-up holiday of wine appreciation day
I'm approaching homosexuality at an increasingly alarming rate with each break up.
I have to answer enough questions about you, I don't need your uterus tossed in the conversation.
I want to pinterest what I want to do with my pubes. Why isn't there a board for that?!
You're cock blocking me from my own boyfriend. What kind of shit is that?
Fuck me this girl I went home with has a cover on her remote control so there is no spills to ruin it. Imagine how many condoms she's going to make me wear
Lets just put it this way. Im meeting his nana after a mind blowing orgasm.
She's the perfect storm of great hair, big boobs, intellectualism, and mild moral ambiguity.
I got the job! The hiring manager is the sister of a guy I slept with so its like I'm a real adult now
He woke up to me masturbating during the presidential address. Now he won't stop making jokes.
Randomize
