I found your undies. They were wrapped around my leg.
Hope the move went well! I'll miss you!
you are a cunt and I hated living with you and your skeezy boyfriend.Just thought I'd get that out there.
I want to make a zoo with you.
one day john is going to snap and they are going to make a new show called "john and chainsaw minus 9"
my mom is pro-life. I dare you to fuck me.
Tiger Woods should have just walked in, gave everyone a high five, and left.
I woke up at 2 pm to my roommate checking my pulse.
czant get you from the arport. sry i found the rum. dan sucks at rumpong jusrt so yo knoqw.
Ya well here is the deal with last night, it was the Biggest shit show we have ever co-stared in.
It's times like this I miss having my nipples pinched
I think there's a problem with society when I'm shopping for lingerie and I think "man some of these would make kickass shirts"
Rigtt?!
I've started drunk signing up for 5ks. Who even does that?
I'm never going out with the ashleys again. it was whoreible. terrifyingly whoreible.
So anyway, I'm just floating along life with my vibrator and low expectations.
How much have you had to drink?
Qhaghao Oslo?
That seems like quite a lot.
Randomize
