Once you see the odd facial expressions and noises a guy makes while he is furiously beating off on top of you, it kind of puts things into perspective.
He about cried when I ordered pizza online. He said it was a miracle.
I KNOW you don't honestly think you can pay me back in lotto tickets.
I woke up hungover and reached for a glass of water only to realize too late that it was vodka sprite with my splooge in it.
you ever feel like there is a sober person insided you pointing and laughing....?
he ate out my asshole, i really don't think he gets embarrassed easily.
the way i see it him paying 500 bucks for my fake abortion is karma's way of punishing him for cheating on his wife
I always figured rock bottom would've involved more hookers
She told me she's going to buy a projector so she can watch porn on her ceiling...I'm telling you man this chick is going places
Threesome in a minivan. New low
Yes and yes. Got taken to a Florida strip club. I desperately want to flood my eyes and ears with hand sanitizer right now.
Question: would Brian be pissed if I brought his 17 year old sister as my date to the wedding?
I just remember going to take a piss and looking down on the floor and thinking "that looks comfortable" and then I was out.
my poor anus
So then edible panties?
Jesus no he likes candy too much, I'd lose a lip
Randomize
