My dick has been asking about u. He said he didn't do anything wrong n I'm a dumbass
her teeth looked like a whores toenails, i was too horrified to
Tell her to not eat the pizza she threw up on.
So I've officially decided that I AM that drunken mistake that girls hate themselves for in the morning.
All I remember from my 21st is crying because the bouncer made him put his shirt back on
The 9th floor RA wants to know why we stacked 21 cinder blocks in the shower, and I can't remember. Do you?
we bought a duck. we're keeping him in our dorm room. don't ever try to tell me you've had a better freshman year than me.
He's the kind you'd bring home and you'd wake up and all your food would be half eaten on the kitchen floor and all your socks would be missing.
The best part about this city is obvious. Someone saw me crouching by a bar pissing in my leftover Panera bread bowl and they just winked.
please, i've had weekends with less dignity than this.
Well his arms broken so they only cuffed his good wrist to his belt. That's how he cast smacked me in custody.
They had to stop us from skinny dipping in the reflection pool of the Mormon temple.
I've never seen an uncircumcised penis. I mean in person. I've clearly seen an uncircumcised penis. I have the google.
They're magnificent. It's like god made her last but hadn't fulfilled his boob quota.
I'm eating pizza in the bathtub
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