I want 2 things right now, you or a cig
cig
He introduced her to the DMA meeting by saying: in the past few years i've never seen someone work so hard for so little success
The liquor store is having an inventory reduction sale. It would be a sin not to stop and help them out.
And we all know God doesn't like sinners.
Amen.
All I remember from my 21st is crying because the bouncer made him put his shirt back on
If I come over right now will you promise to distract your grandpa in the morning so I don't have to do the walk if shame with 1940's style judgement?
ttyl tear gas
That bar is one yeast infection away from total annihilation.
This is kind of a weird question but were you the other girl Ben asked to do a group sex thing with?
We don't have any ice, so I'm using the frozen cognac to reduce the swelling on Abby's toe.
We met some guy at the beach, and dug a hole with him. He invited us to "come back at night and smoke a blunt in this hole"
A hefty woman and I mean hefty shoved her number in my pocket at the gym without as much as a hello, winked and kept walking. Going to use your bed to defile her, don't want her to know where I live or have my neighbors see! Thanks, you're a pal!
I'll probably just end up banging you in your parents marital bed,in their honor of course.
I just watched will sing pure imagination from willy wonka and then blow a banana
look, im sorry that i yelled at your little brother, threw my car keys at him and smashed a stale cookie with a pool cue, but i swear to god i didn't poop on the floor. it was one of your dogs.
So it turns out that a Ford Focus does not fit in a Walmart cart return.
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