Why did we buy the only spinning apartment on campus?
Afterwards she curled up in my dog's bed and slept there all night
How mad was your dog?
she kept yelling 'call me bella'
I need to stop sleeping with republicans and cowboys fans.
yesterday, he said he didn't trust me around his daughter because "if she was wrapped in rolling paper u'd smoke her." yup.
we walked in to her beating him with a broom while he was trying to sweep ramen into a box. there were packing peanuts everywhere.
I assume you will show your seat mates your vibrating cock ring.
And my only real exposure to Russian culture is you and Internet porn.
N.C. cops just used a megaphone to tell me I have a slutty outfit. My life is complete.
He woke up, yelled "RALLY!" and then puked in my glove compartment
Dude so last night I was eating out my gf and her kitten climbed onto my back and fell asleep. AND SHE DIDN'T NOTICE FOR LIKE 10 MINUTES
Wait, but now I'm curious. In what position were y'all when the cops came? Were you guys butt ass naked in the car? 😂😂
Rain drop, shock top, drinking can't stop stop
He doesn't wear a seatbelt. He votes Republican. He has a small dick. That house of cards just fell apart.
27 year olds can still do oral in a car right? Or is that trashy?
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