it hurts more in the daytime
Ill do this for you.
You are a team player.
This is me making up for not putting my tongue inside you more.
I just realized that the music from spongebob is also used in real sex HBO.
i cleaned the weed out of my bowl, pretended it was a spoon and ate oatmeal with it. my mom cried
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
any chance you can send me your legal ethics outline, in exchange for say, me buying you a lapdance the next time we go to the strip club?
Yeah i knew he wasn't okay when he told me he was "seeing his vision"
I have two stamps on my hand....ones from the bar and one is from an aquarium...care to explain?
He kept calling my vagina a magic clam, and it was speaking to him, telling him to feed it his penis. I played along.
Its... i dont even know. theres lots of rap music and i cant find my shoes
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Carrying your underwear around in your purse on Sunday morning is its own religious experience
It is officially Christmas time in Chicago. There's a drunk hobo on the CTA singing the first 2 lines of Frosty the Snowman over and over and over.
I'm getting better, this year I only showed up drunk to 1 final.
We just got in a fight with grandma b/c she tried to tell us you didn't go hard.
It's like an adderall Houdini. Right when you think you have a deal he disappears
I like to send nudes ok? If that's my biggest flaw I think I'm ok
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