Thank you as well. My penis is starting a slow-clap right now.
She just passive-aggressively stripped in the kitchen while humming the theme to Doug.
Josh has a goal of being naked in every RAs room this year. He's already 3/11.
Please never let me the drunk fat dancer in the bus girl
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Obviously you've never slept with someone who was deliverance level inbred.
Get a piano. I want to have sex on it.
C'mon. I'm still an alcoholic at heart, regardless of its broken or not
I CAN'T FUCK HIM OUTSIDE. THAT'S FOR PEASANTS. HE'S TOO FAMOUS FOR THAT.
I'm watching the Brazzers version of Mary Poppins and enjoying it. Volume on and all. 45 minutes.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I swear to god if I see a single piece of genitalia I'm driving back to LI and smacking you back to the Italian Renaissance
I just scored a new eye doctor and a date all in one email. BOOM!
Literally had a conversation with the pizza as to why it was a bad idea to reach in the back seat and grab a slice while driving. The pizza was right, it was safer to just wait until I got home.
Update: pile o Coke party starting at approx 4 - 7 and going until 1ish to celebrate our founding fathers and love of cocaine and hatred of everyone\n
so hungover. idk whos house or comp im on
The gift for sixth anniversary is steel. He bought me handcuffs. Inee I married the right man!
Randomize