the more pounds shes got the more points. bonus points awarded for specialty moves used. aka broken cowboy, tobogan, dutch oven, or brazilian fake out.
So i'm in mason getting an ultrasound.. and there are a bunch of hicks in here with their wild ass children and this one young mom yells at her kid "harley sit!"
You should introduce yourself as garth. As in garth brooks.
Idk what else to talk about besides you paying for half of my vaginaplasty.
theres a kid in a leopard robe and sunglasses filling up a gas tank. i miss college
It's isn't revenge sex until you've cum on her porcelain doll collection.
Woke up fully clothed in bed sleeping on my purse.....we're back!!!
This is what happens when you live with someone you met on Grindr
Btw. U, me, male strippers, beer. Gonna happen. We could totally get TNT from like u know TNT places
sorry there isn't a 'perfect ass' emoji
if you're not jumping for joy when you see penis then you're looking at the wrong ones.
so i showed up to the bars in a sombrero and a tie as a headband... so yeah, they didn't let me in
honestly if there were pictures of last night i would be embarrassed.... im embarrassed without pictures
Its mothers day... Can my present be an orgasm...for once?
YOUR MANICOTTI IS FULL OF LIES
Sorry i meant to send that to my mom
We were totally high while having sex, I told him fast or slow, just follow your balls. That was a show stopper.
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