so heres a good story. about 6 hrs ago i took a bath with bruce blasting. and 6 hrs later i woke up still in my bathtub but in cold water
My goal for the party is to get everyone in a diaper. Reasonable?
Either he has two lazy eyes or he really likes my tits..
I call biggest shit show at the party. I welcome all challengers.
Did I at antime last saturday slip away and sign up for a prayer circle?
You know when you can feel the alcohol in your toes? That's a great feeling.
I just found my "random bang list for summer of 2012" that I wrote last night.. It's written on a Plan B receipt. If this isn't irony I don't know what is.
Also they do not have any come back to america, i miss my fuck buddy cards at Hallmark.
I'm more of a 'talk at me while I stare at you' kinda girl.
I'm running on jager fumes right now. It's like I put diesel in a prius and said fuck it.
You fucked that MILF against my car!
How would you know?
She scratched her name into my window with her bigass wedding ring. btw she wants you to call her
I stood in my living room with two beers in my hand asking these said beers if they were going to drink each other. I then insisted that I would drink them and chugged both. Happy Halloween.
Henceforth: booty calls will now be referred to as "deliveries of anatomy". That is all.
Sex with you deserves a trophy and a day of remembrance in honor of it.
It's been THREE DAYS. Why do I still have the munchies?!
Randomize
