Don't be scared. It'll feel very good. And you'll be clean afterwards. I'm growling right now.
Why. Ill be the rabbit if ull be the carrot.
is it sad that pink shorts and cowboy hats remind me of getting jizz in the hair?
shotgunning a bud heavy is like shotgunning a turkey sandwich
Even the bar was yelling boobs, so of course the shirt came off
She's using our floating beer pong table as an air mattress to sleep on.
I left my pipe in my center console with a bowl packed when I took my car to the shop, and when I picked it up the weed had been smoked, but my oil change was only half price.
Did u smell a guys dreadlocks in the McDonald's drive thru line last night or did I dream that?
In the middle of our bar crawl last night we stopped to pet dogs at a dog park. who would let a drunk person bet play with their dog???
Yeah, tell that to my thumb. Cause it was up my ass all night waiting for you.
I snapchatted his face mid sex. Needless to say, I don't think I'll ever see him again.
My vibrator box just fell off the table and hit my cat in the head, he is a little stunned. Good thing I went medium size
He saved that picture of my boobs for good luck romance still exists
Is it sad or funny that I just bought two pregnancy test at the dollar store to give away to people on New Year's Eve while driving for Uber.
I wore my lizzie mcguire socks to the bar last night. Because that's how i get all the ladiez
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