I am doing a scientific study and i need a brief description of the underpants you are wearing
So I pulled my t-shirt down, pushed my boobs up and marched right into that church!
I'm not inviting you over anymore if my cat keeps ending up in the freezer...
i wish i was a boy too so i knew what a blow job felt like
bouncer thought i was tryin to get the license plate numbers of strippers to stalk them. I had to go show him where I threw up to get back in.
it's fine if we fail the bar, we were never going to satisfy the moral character requirement anyway
if i actually bought condoms for every time i had sex, i could single handedly fix the economy
This girl just swallowed a pealed banana whole. I'm not worthy.
I dunno. Last time I went there I had got sexually propositioned by a Belgian prince.
the mechanics of walkigng feel weird right now everyone lools like a demon
what does alcohol mean
HOW ARE YOU ALWAYS DRUNK? AND WHERE ARE TOU TRYING TO GO??
I won the booty shaking contest by mooning the whole bar
Weird come down, just saw a woman on the train go to grab something and realised she had terrifying hands. They literally filled me with dread. I don't think I'm ok.
I'm definitely closer to having sex in every building on campus than I am to having a post-graduation career/plan/future. Unless that future is getting fucked in lots of buildings. I got that shit on lock down.
last night I used snow as a chaser
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