Why can't we have signs that automatically flash on our foreheads that say not interested when gross ugly guys come around, like those glasses that get dark when the sun comes out?
i recognized the place by the puke stain i left on the pool table when i hooked up with his roommate.
its totally unfair that im just as ill-prepared as a 16 year old but there's no tv show for 25 and pregnant.
I need to make a 'no kissing' rule for my casual hookups during cold season...this cold is so not worth it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Things we need. Powerade. Water in fridge. Mixers for vodka. And reality checks.
You fell on your face and the waitress just brought you a fresh drink
She is singing the swedish chef song and throwing utensils. I love this place
I remember telling you it was cold out because the sun was going to explode and people were going to fight for corn. I feel I've mislead you.
All you have to do is speak. Your voice reverberates strait to my vagina.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He invited me over for shower sex and pizza. Officially the best booty call relationship around.
We peed together in a dark alley while holding hands. That is a bond that can never be broken.
all I know is this drummer better stop eye fucking me while he plays cowbell. it is way too early for that.
I didn't want to see any of his nipples and now I've seen all three. Thanks.
To be fair, this is a tequila-while-rewatching-Benedict-Cumberbatch-as-Van-Gogh idea, so I don't know if it will hold up tomorrow.
Probably not. Getting pulled over and puking my guts out on the side of the road in front of the cop and him making fun of me, was not my finest moment. Plus I lost my debit card.
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