I just am on my way home.. i had 3 and one startd crying and puking.. so they went home. one bitch fuckin ruined it for evryone.. u playin cards?
Yeah, it wasn't as bad as I thought. I tried not to clench and things went pretty smoothly.
He spent the whole night convincing me I wasn't fat, but after we had sex he said "Oh, I see what you mean"
repeat this after me. period at the beach is better than baby at the beach. breathe. and: period at the beach is better than baby at the beach.
if youre pregnant and ruin my spring break i'll never forgive you.
shes 19, drunk and said she has no gag reflex. im trying to decide if i have scruples
you dont
i dont
He only talks to me during the summer and it's probably because I let him fuck me in my pool last year.
Too bad you can't keep me under your desk. You'd love that wouldn't you? Massages, blowjobs, and I'd be forced to be quiet all day.
Told my prof I have mono so that he won't judge me when I show up hungover and looking like shit to class every day.
Just skip
Please. i have SOME standards
And by pregame I mean drink heavily and watch Russian dash cam car crash vids
This girl just said she was late for class because she was having sex.
If you bet guys that you can drink them under the table they will pay for your drinks all night until they pass out. I have this down to a science that I think even my dad would appreciate.
My mom and sister were over. When my drunk roommate came home, he yelled "GOT BITCHES IN MY CONDO"
found a thong and $20 in my right pocket. it's going to be a good day
I woke up naked and alone this morning. What a life
Randomize
