That bar we were at last night smelled like cougars. Virginia Slims, Aqua Net and Summer's Eve.
I learned his name tonight. This now makes him a real person. Obviously, I no longer want to sleep with him.
I love Japanese schoolgirls with short skirts riding bikes on windy days.
You're never coming back, are you?
It's not fair. Guys with dicks that huge should not be allowed to be catholic.
She wasn't to happy when she went to put her shirt on and it was covered in cum I just looked at her and said collateral damage....
At the bar. Madeline and I totally brought our own pitcher from home because they always run out. Hello alcoholism.
you vomited through the snorkel and onto the back of your head. it was truly amazing
One step ahead. Always. Roses are red, violets are blue... I'm gonna fuck you with a rake.
I couldn't find my shirt this morning so I stole one from his eight year old sister. Slutted up my outfit quite a bit.
She was a little hefty, so I turned on the strobe light in our room. Everything looks better with a strobe light.
That broad from the bar put her name in my phone as "The girl I'm going to marry in 10 years".
I just want you to know when I bang him in the back of my car later I'll have pony by ginuwine on repeat
It's a little hazey but I think I tried to request Nelly last night. There was no dj. Not sure who I was talking to
I'm not gonna plow a chick in front of her 14 year old brother....
i don't want him to see me in a bathing suit.
hasn't he seen you naked?
well yeah, but it's different in a bathing suit.
Randomize