i have some very unhappy turtles in my backseat
what am i going to do when LOST is over? What am i going to get high to?
after he gave me a diploma for giving him amazing head, getting a regular diploma isnt all that cool.
Quick question: how long can sperm live in a rug?
It is scary how often "just flash him" is your advice.
Hey fuck you and your taint. I'm just riding a canoe called life, back the fuck off. P.s. I need a ride
You see.... Im at the point in my life where pissing in a toilet is a luxury for me
Ugh I can't even look at alcohol this weekend, my body needs to heal.
You see it tends to piss fathers off when they find their daughter in the arms of a shirtless guy that neither he nor his daughter knows.
Pencil dick carries the name proudly.
Your smile makes me feel like I'm frolicking through a field of gummy bears.
I was looking at the storm clouds during my run and one oddly resembled ur penis
I had a dream that I got you so wet that you flooded my apartment
You know what sucks about being drunk at 4 pm? Not a god damn thing.
He just told me I was beautiful, whilst I peed into a cup. If this isn't love I don't know what is.
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