you made me watch la bamba, and then you yelled at me for disrespecting your mexican heritage.
dude ... she has a full length mirror in her shower, don't even tell me shes not dtf
im trying to make cookies in the george foreman
Weird we were more concerned with sharing our germs than tag teaming the blow job?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
there is literally a full grown man stuck between the radiator and her bed. i thought i kicked him out 20 minutes ago but nope we found him
She said my new name was "ranch" because I "looked delicious"
Pack light, we're going straight to bar from the train. No place to put our shit.
Dude all I'm bringing is my dick and a phone charger.
i want to have his babies. i NEED to. shit i wont even ask for child support, he's that goodlooking.
Cause I'll toss Tabasco sauce in his eyes and yell "Cobra attack" and walk away
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm 10 cats away from completing my post divorce transformation.
I'm so baked, I spent the last hour trying to screencapture the cracks on my phone.
You probably shouldn't do that...but if you do take pictures
I just left a 3 minute voicemail to the guy I want to fuck baby talking my cats and I don't know if I can delete it 😐
I'm either hallucinating or there is a dying cat outside my apartment....
Got baked and laid and ate baked lays when I laid down while baking the brownies I I’m Superman
You’re still high, aren’t you?
Oh yeah
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