I just put a picture of what I imagine Rob's dick looks like on it on my vision board. thank you Oprah!
I just wnated to let you know that I laminated my history notes so i can study in the shower.
bottle of wine in one hand cigar in the other. 5 am. topless on our fire escape. and she cleaned our bathroom... i like his new girlfriend.
I just found what appears to be a tooth in my purse...anybody missing one?
ATTENTION ALL CONTESTANTS OF SLUTFEST 2012 ; not only will we be judging on how many penis you have sucked but also girth and length will be calculated. If you are found lying you will be disqualified. Remember your fellow participants will be rendering the same services to probably the same people. So choose wisely and let the games begin!
I'm laying in the fetal position on the floor of my kitchen eating potato salad with my fingers. Please come over with some real food and keep me company.
You know i'm the father figure
Yeah the father who ate her out with me last night. Great dad
Just had to hide the fact that I'm not wearing underwear from my 7 year old niece.
His parents know me as "the white shoed screamer"
plus there's no nice way to tell a guy you physically hate the shape of their cock.
Whats your number? 5 or more?
Cinco. It sounds smaller in Spanish.
If there was a tv show called "True Life: My 58 Year Old Dad Rolls Better J's Than Me" I'd be on it.
I am making up for a 7 year dry spell so I get a pass and I don't always care if there is a second date. It is like college but with more money and condoms.
there's people who respect me enough not to bang on my bed and i think that's beautiful
Standing straight up with intensity he came in his own mouth. I know this because he showed me the video from five different angles when asked if I would like him to demonstrate. And I did.
Randomize
