I had a dream that chipotle was out of burritos... Was more like a nightmare.. Gotta go make sure it wasn't real now
Had a couple pieces of pizza for breakfast...suck on that Jamie Oliver.
Its alot easier to hide alcohol when your wearing a toga..
everythings easier when your wearing a toga.
I just want a box on franzia all to myself. Just me, my wine, my tears, & my self loathing.
Ummm I just broke my no puke streak at church
Just break the ice by asking who had to take plan b this past semester
i just sent him like 8 different sexts and he texted me back about how good the hummus is that i left in his fridge.
He's currently surrounded by roughly 23 girls he fucked and never called. He may not make it out of here. Bar of doom? Or of redemption?
Nope. Too hot. We just sat in my tub with cold water spraying on us drinking coronas. This summer heat is killing my libido slowly
that's all we do, eat and hve sex, eat and have sex. he thinks it's bad and that we need to talk more or whatever but I'm just not seeing the problem...
It wasn't good. I can tell by the way he fucks me he watched too much porn
hey remember that mom you brought home from the bar last month... she is currently driving me back to her place. turning my phone off now.
It makes showers more interesting trying to drink a gin and tonic and keep soap out of my eyes at the same time.
You need to calm down.
He plays D&D and his dick should be carved out of marble. I think I'm in love.
Saw your dad at the bar last night... And again this morning when he left. Told you not to mess with me bitch.
Randomize
