I don't think he understands the importance of corndogs. Or condoms for that matter.
Tomorrow morning i will black in to find a christmas tree in my room that i dont remember how i got. I love college
I don't fucking care about the convenience of not having freudian slips. I spent 2009-2011 screwing around with 3 different Daniels. 2012 WILL be the dawn of a new day
How about a mike?
Already had two of those
Let me put it this way - if I had a list of things I would like between my legs, she would rank below the cello I turned into firewood sophomore year.
Guess who is playing his new drum set when his roommate gets home to teach her a lesson about binge drinking to the point of being taken to the emergency room?
So glad I decided to show up and puke in your trashcan.
These are the moments that bond souls forever.
You threw up on yourself mid conversation with your mom and then told her a girl at the party puked on you.
If we can only get laid once in a blue moon, apparently this will be our month.
There were four people in the car. The girls sure know how to blow. I think we almost crashed when the driver climaxed.
Well I was thinking of taking him out for drinks then lecturing him about his drinking... kind of like an open minded intervention
I will consider it. I need to determine if ogling him is worth almost certain death via zipline.
Someone took a shit in the house somewhere and I STILL can't find it. I'm just going to move.
Bro I just got a hand job playing tiny wings.. Hell yea
There are 6 of us in a mini cooper and his maid is in the trunk...she needed a ride.
I feel really sorry for my toilet right now
Randomize
