I never noticed this but I have a beauty mark on my labia minora
Please tell me how you discovered this.
I was looking in the mirror snooping around
Woke up with puke in my bed and my pockets full of Tootsie Rolls.
Jealous.
So after I pop out this baby we need to just go on a monthlong coke binge so I can get skinny again before vegas
As for the 14 hours of vodka. I am all that is man.
Every man needs a table where they can sit and reflect on the successful penile conquests of the day.
This conversation has now reached a level of awkward that even a passerby streaking hobo couldn't break.
I feel my soul being ripped out of my eye sockets
Dude true life I died at the derby...I lost everyone I knew, went down a bourbon and mud slip and slide, lost my hat, fell off the roof of a porta potty, sprained my ankle and knee and then got arrested.
But in defense of this shit summer we've had, I totally perfected my shotgunning skills. I have achieved my summer goal.
I took multi-tasking to a new level. I just ate a plate of nachos off my lap while driving to the bar. And I barely got any on me.
Will Smith has a direct hotline to my emotions
I am attempting to break the habit of calling him daddy.
I passed out in your bed last night...there maybe a snickers and twix bar under your pillow
I just landed at Logan and some guy threw up in the baggage carousel. Boston never really changes
Thanks for driving us home last night. Also, blanket apology for anything I may have said/done. I blacked out sometime near the t-shirt cape incident
Randomize
