I wonder if you could grow some weed in a chia pet
i sleep in a fine layer of vodka and semen. i don't know that that would appropriate for a pajama rally.
that coffee was exactly what I needed. Also whose awesome hat is on the couch with ear flaps? I wanna put my head in it
Shaking her cervix like it's the hottest ticket around
after giving each other head, we had a really nice post-oral heart to heart. found out he lost his virginity in a threesome.
Absolutely. Last time I signed up for a softball league I had sex with my high school economics teacher.
Somehow me showing up to/breaking into her house only to find I was a week early for the party became a night of weed cookies and sex.
let's be real here, you have a beautiful vagina. this kid is a doctors son. that's a remedy for beautiful rich grandkids. he is just trying water his family tree, and make sure he doesn't end up in some piece of shit adult home. go for it.
In other news, someone I've had sex with won jeopardy last night.
he gifted me a vibrator as he was breaking up with me. you tell me how my night went
I choose McDonald's breakfast at 1:28am over sex anytime
You've never sent a girl a dick pic?
Call me old fashioned
How is it possible that I'm still a virgin and you've managed to have sex in a cheetah print onesie TWICE
yeah the cops just showed up and they got there ass handed to them at beer pong.
Whenever I have a bad day I just look at the negetive pregnancy test I keep in my purse and remind myself things could be alot worse.
Randomize
