Do you think Patty Mayonase ever went down on Doug?
Could you explain why there is an Australian passport in your toilet?
We already established this. No, he did not cum on the dog.
Taking my tights off outside the club to give them to the homeless man was my contribution to humanity. The fact that it was snowing just made me feel like superman.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There are a bunch of guys at the door looking for the guy you brought back to the condo...pretended not to speak English. You're welcome.
She showed me her tits and my first thought was "I want these to feed my future children." I'm scared.
I own a halfway home for drunk girls, this is my life
I'm considering offering a class on how to find good porn.
I may be going to Mexico. I just met a drug dealer at a strip club. Seems legit.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why is your ex naked in my apartment?
Moral of the story: fuckboys never change
I'm not dropping acid and watching game of thrones with you. That just sounds like a disaster waiting to happen.
He wants me to fart in his mouth and is offering me SOOOO much coke. I'm stuck between a rock and a hard place. GIVE ME ADVICE.
Isn't it funny how we're still best friends after that incident with the old lady in the bathroom
You fucking bailed on me. But I love you still
I woke up spooning with two strangers on Saturday morning... I felt like a sexual sandwich
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