i left the bar a little after you and ended up flipping my car in the arbys drive thru
i want to bang the Snorg tees girl.. shes always smiling ;)
Hookers taste better with whip cream
Maybe we ought to get some pennicillin too
Fair enough
4 feet of snow. teaching the cats how to snow swim. throwing them off the porch and seeing what happens.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We saw a kid playing in poison ivy. We walked away, he'll learn his lesson.
I think i can make this amish girl legitimately hot.
I swear to God, I just heard my guardian angel tell us to stop. I think we should listen.
Complete silence. Background Willy Wonka music. An empty back of Lay's BBQ chips. These are the ingredients for an extreme acid trip.
I'm sick of being the only unemployed member of the group. Doing things alone isn't partying. Its sad.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I didnt realize how badly my legs were scratched up from power-fucking him in the bushes until kate dumped a bottle of vodka on me. that shit burnedddd
I'm still working on figuring out my birthday blowjob schedule. I'd love to just have all three of them get in there but I get the feeling they wouldn't like that.
I'm up in my room and I just saw a naked guy sprint out into the streets from my mom's party downstairs
you don't understand it took me an hour and a half to escape that bed, I had to memorize his sleeping patterns.
He stole one of my good bras again. If I'm not getting laid I'm not putting with this shit. Also it's a walk of shame for you today, my car is suicidal again.
Look don't ask questions just know that one thing led to another and I have a shot glass stuck in my ass. I need your help!!!
Randomize