You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
You're ridiculous
Your hot
well thats why i like him. because he makes you happy. on the other hand i think he masturbates too much while texting you.
why did i wake up to an event notice that says "Shit Just Got Real"?
The only downside so far to having a guy roommate is that when he's doing a walmart run, I just can't bring myself to ask him to pick up a pregnancy test for me. I feel like that's just too much too soon.
When she was giving me head last night it felt like there was a NASCAR pit crew working on my dick.
So far we've hooked up on a pool table, on a public bathroom counter and now in a little league baseball dugout. We haven't even made to a house yet.
Okay, just a casual question: how did i manage to get grass stains on the inside of my bra?
From russia with love. But also with chlamydia.
You know it was a good night when you're lying on the couch in your pjs at 4pm having a pitcher of ice water for breakfast.
Dude, just found out there's a monster in a video game named after me. No more dating nerds.
Not gonna make it. My ovaries are playing laser tag
I don't know whether to laugh it off or be pissed at him..I got pulled over this morning leaving his place and the officer thought my hickeys were hand prints around my neck and asked if I needed to be escorted out of town.
Good, be his mentor. Like a tiny gay Yoda.
hey at least you are getting hit on, i spent all day researching cat sedatives
Dude. Don't do acid and go to Disney on ice. Hear my warnings. That snow monster will fuck your shit up.
Randomize
