I saw a sign that said worlds largest frying pan next exit. Way to do your fucking part Iowa.
girl! he was asleep with his back to me.he farted and i actually felt the wind blow across my leg.nice
Change your flight to Denver. That's where my penis is.
I'm going to listen to christmas music to trick my body into cooling off.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i think i had a heart attack, prayed, and jizzed my pants.all at once.
And he was super vague about his life, it was frustrating. I totally boned a homeless guy, didn't I?
In between when I last wrote and now have screwed a Swiss guy on a hostel bathroom floor. Okay, real life?
I woke up next to her boyfriend and she woke up next to mine....
This is like a fucked up game of musical chairs.
Holy shit there is too much Taco Bell here to talk to you
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Have you ever just woke up in the morning and felt pregnant
You grabbed your house keys, threw them at the door and asked, "did it open?"
It is 5:00PM and I'm just now putting on underwear.
Good morning! Or after noon. Sorry for falling asleep in you
There's a dryer on fire at the laundromat, and everyone's just standing around taking pictures. Except me. I'm texting.
Well, why would you bring gelado into a strip club?
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