One can only hope that this night would end with my thumb in another humans rectum.
I guess there's some 16 and under softball tournament and they all are at my work. what is a 21 year old to do?
The responsible thing...show them the break room.
so looking at the guys i've dated i feel my vag is a halfway house
he just asked me to email him a handle of captain morgans...how sober do you think he is?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The movie was so bad she gave me two blowjobs. Two.
It's 4th of July all over again, we were chasing with the pool water.
I'm love that we're talking about a possible 3rd 3some, and that you're going to be a dad.
nope. just stoned. wishing i had a golf cart.
I've been on the toilet for an hour. On a six day bender. My ass feels like its leaking vodka
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
she hacked my macbook and downloaded an illegal version of the original pokemon red, completely nude in my computer chair. there were several levels of hornyness existing all at once
I'm not winning any crowns in the Miss Emotionally Stable pageant either...
Do it!! We better have a duck by the time I get home.
You are talking to me during sexting hours. Be careful, innuendos are taken seriously
I got a message the other day that just said “great tits”
A gentleman AND a scholar
I had an awesome dream where you were a stegosaurus and I was a triceratops and we were hiding from a t-rex and had mad dino sex
Randomize