My dick has been asking about u. He said he didn't do anything wrong n I'm a dumbass
and she's shaped like a lego person so that's not happening
i knew she was desperate at the point in which she started showing me her naked pics on her phone
I hope, cuz I was gunna get "celebritory drunk" but now I have to get "I'm disappointed drunk"
It's like, I'm the official vagina for that DJ group
French fry pizza
Are you brilliant or just really high?
Can't it be both?
Ski vacations are for hooking up with randoms. It's like I don't even know you
We don't watch enough power rangers
You don't understand!!! BACON ROSES!!! Why are you not more excited?!
my human sexuality class is the only class where the porn i watch the night before is relevant to the discussion the next day
I sent him a tit pic on accident and he replied with "nice ass"
The bump on my forehead, i think, was from falling asleep at front door, on my knees, slumped over. But we played good music so what?
However, you did manage to order seven different drinks while fingering her at the packed bar - it was like watching the pizza men pound the dough in the windows
So anyway, I'm just floating along life with my vibrator and low expectations.
I either have food poisoning or I'm pregnant. Either way, I NEED JESUS!
Randomize
