Why do you apologize after every time we have sex?
Ia nefed hefelkp i am a taxi
We are not buying weed off a guy from the internet.
...She was shooting whiskey using a turkey baster...i was horrified.
And he was super vague about his life, it was frustrating. I totally boned a homeless guy, didn't I?
bark. im thoroughly looking forward to kegs and eggs. next weekend should be pancakes and pinnical, then cereal and seagrams and then whiskey and waffles.
I'm putting "buy a bottle of scotch" on my "productive things to do to procrastinate studying for finals" list
figured after she passed out and i threw up in her bed, morning sex would be pushing it.
how sketchy is it to eat a candy wrapped in masking tape from reggae night? because we totally just split it...
All I know is you walked out of the kitchen in some kind of French onion dip bra and started passing out individual chips to guys saying " do you dip?"
He plays guitar, sings like an angel, and acts like a gentleman. If I don't fuck him by the end of first semester, I'm dropping out
Honestly my life is shambles over a married man who looked like a fuckin NERD ON HIS WEDDING DAY
My liver is screaming fuck you right now.
rock bottom is drinking straight vodka from a protein shaker, singing one direction and crying alone in your room. exams.
So I'm at home coloring while smoking a joint. It can only go down hill from here.
Randomize
