So I got my period. Finally. In related news, I reinstated my belief in God.
I'm sitting in my bathroom sink, eating a tuna sandwich. He had better weed than I expected.
We have to talk through the words with friends chat so his gf won't find out
i will be the first lesbian to ever fail women's studies.
I woke up tied to the door handle with reindeer patterned socks. You can tell it's Christmas.
THIS NIGHT WILL NOT GO DICKLESS
He goes to Columbia so regardless of how he looks I should fuck him right?
I think my favorite day of the week is the day we get to fuck
So I guess I bought a cat last night. Fuuuccckkk.
Drinking hard cider in a room full of freshman girls. Never felt so secure of my manhood
I probably wouldn't
Powdered alcohol is a real thing now. Move over crystal light... Water bottles rejoice!!
WINE AND FILM. TALK ABOUT AN UPGRADE FROM NETFLIX AND CHILL.
Always keep a stash of tequila in your work desk. That is like adulting 101.
I mean seriously...It's like the universe is saying "your vagina is closed, move along"
While walking to class I was handed a red bull, condoms, and a mini bible. I love my school.
Randomize
