YEA!!! I'll throw you a non-baby shower.
He's married, but his wife isn't my neighbor so I don't feel bad about coveting him.
I'm going to write a book about John. It's going to be called big dreams, little dick
right. well i dont plan on getting laid till i find a respectable girl that i can make unrespectable
Dude i'm seriously thinking about his nipples.
Well if you're drunk enough to make some mistakes this week I'd be down to redeem myself for my poor performance.
Someone touched my vagina when we were out last night. The fact that it was you is inconsequential and I am still counting it as a pull.
Dude he did say "let's go cougar hunting" and you KNEW your mom was going out last night...so it's kind of your own fault for not coming
Is it rude to ask for an autograph after giving him a blowjob in their hotel's hot tub?
Did body shots with a guy... Ended up being the ref of my volleyball game... So that's why we won
His mom said he was in the ER and asked for prayers and positive thoughts. Apparently, me wishing the clap on him is not what she had in mind.
Cheyanne in woods. Ducks attacked. My toe is bleeding. We are gpsing our way home on foot. No worries
I'm bleeding and have questions
I am at a cat party and I just witnessed people lapping vodka out of a bowl for a contest. Lol
I just licked honey off my own tit. Is there anything about that which doesn't SCREAM single???
Randomize
