You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.
I'm not gay.
Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?
If ghandi gives good head...I'm in
Its fine.
I wish I could put booze in boobs and store it for later. I wouldn't need a flask. For $7000, they should do amazing things like that.
His bond is $50,000..margarita Monday might get cancelled
He has a tattoo of a carebear. This is not happening.
there is no 'pace myself' on the blackout express
So recap time do u remember biting that girls hand?
Just had an epiphany about how to drink more effectively in the shower. While walking across campus carrying a Franzia bag like Santa
She's started this new thing where whenever she drives by random couples talking alone outside she yells "break up! this is your sign!"
If anyone remembers any details of tonight please address concerns to my lawyer. This is a mass text.
I have meat and whiskey. will you bring condoms?
I just did the walk of shame in monkey slippers in the snow
Teach me the song of your people
You will drink beer in a kiddie pool in your back yard but you wont bring a girl home
in retrospect i think my mom tried to raise me gay
Leave it to me to pull up my boyfriend’s grandfather’s obituary just to find out the name of his sister.
Yeah, oh and the story gets better. His friend was dressed as a christmas tree wrapped in twinkle lights and had to plug himself in the wall all night.
Randomize
