ask if his dick looks like a sausage. alex's bro told me that's a sure sign. btw took pain pills. maybe shouldn't listen to me.
I just saw a midget ride by on a scooter...wearing a bowtie and a helmet. My life is complete.
It was all about her orgasm last night. I felt like a human dildo.
The dog just did a longer kegstand than anyone at the party
you were saying "i am the vodka queen!" and then in a different voice replying to yourself "all hail the vodka queen! you are so beautiful!"
I know you're trying to keep the moaning to a minimum but the banging on the wall is totally giving you away
is it possible i asked you to give me a preliminary pap smear?
It's official, the cities waste management does not recycle porn.
And I feel bad.
Because we're having a serious discussion about our sex life and you're playing minecraft?
Can I just put my face in your boobs and forget the world?
You're tall, so I have high hopes for your dick.
I didn't know. I guess I really haven't had that much time for drinking lately. I mean, outside drinking at home/work.
All I know, is I had green sex and beer and got driven home. That's it.
I'm nothing if not determined to sleep with everyone at that company
And how about the fact that the first time i really truly looked at a guy's dick was in my car. MY CAR. GODDAMNIT!!!
Randomize
