I Bought a bracelet with bible characters and a charm broke. the virgin mary one. Do you think it's a sign?
marching band practice is quite the interesting soundtrack to sex
i convinced her that her period would come back if we did it doggy style
It's only slutty when someone else does it. It's okay if it's us though
she asked me which thongs i though her boyfriend would like best. fuck the friend zone
I can't believe you just became a stipulation in their divorce papers.
It's annoying. I only date people who are 6 foot 3, drug dealers, or 2 years older than me.
Oh shut up man. Once the police get involved its every man for themself.
Just drug him and when he wakes up be like "you just woke up from a coma, we've been married for the past five years." It'll be like the Vow but fucked up.
I had sex on a sidewalk in downtown Chicago... I don't think I have anymore morals to lose.
We have to do it Saturday and get a thirty. If i remember correctly it takes me 12 beers to become a wizard
We were fucking in the back of my truck and no joke a skunk came up and sprayed us. How am I supposed to explain this to my parents
I'm out of breath and my thighs burn but at least it's over.
I'm hiding in my office refusing to turn the light on holding puke down stealing and shoveling down the meeting snacks and regretting my poor life choices. goldfish crackers are like crack to me right now. how is your day?
My ex gave me head because she said she didn't enough when we were dating... Best ex ever? I think yes.
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