Confirm your location. A cross street is best, but if google mapping yourself is your least-shameful option go for it. ps- going through his mail for an actual address is always an option.
woke up this morning wit a massive hangover. walked to my truck and found at least 35 for sale signs, a stop sign, and a julie kim sign...need answers
yea, you decided to become a real estate agent last night on the way home from the party. You started bitchin about how Julie Kim was stealing all your buisness....
So after THIS dui, I've decided to stop driving. Not drinking, just quit driving.
I want Jason Statham to talk British to my vagina.
My mom seriously just told me my insurance company pays for rehab. In an email. I expect a real, not just us joking, intervention coming on. I'm not accepting a "lunch date" with that bitch.
you don't know true fear until you are a convinced that velociraptors are trying to kill you through your roof.
I feel like "stop licking my face" isn't something that needs to be repeated twice
Haha, you avoided her at all costs. And then she shoved her tits in your face
You never know how much you love your bed until you sleep with 4 other people in your car.
SEX BINGO!
Canadian or clown?
I tolerate his mediocre drunk sex for the mind blowing morning sex. More than worth it.
Drunk me just left a note for sober me apologizing for all the fucking crumbs in our bed
While having sex, a German accent isn't sexy.
"The More You Know"
Of all of my friend's husbands, I like when yours hits on me best
Awe that means so much to us
You said too many real things and now I need to crawl back inside my protective fort of sarcasm, being an asshole, and sass
Randomize