so tomorrow. i'm thinking coinstar then adderall?
this girl with a french braid down the center of her head won't stop talking about the benefits of the free market. i'm hungover, bloated and haven't slept for 4 days. shut up french braid girl, shut up.
My sheets, bed, and bathroom are covered in blood. She needed 14 stitches after a trip to ER. This is the last white girl I ever hookup with.
THAT stays in the CAR. And if one fucking person who was NOT in the car brings it up, I will KILL you. Thank you.
..So we should take it off Youtube?
Hey do you want me to wrap up that Jack in the Box you left in my gutter
You're either a hooker or Beyonce. Beyonce is abnormally good at doing everything in heels
So this is what you do on your hungover days off put your balls into an egg carton?
It's okay. I've dumbed down my notes over the semester because I knew I wouldn't be up to understanding things come finals.
This is a sacred holiday in the land of the free! I do what I want!
as he was bent over the toilet, he turned to me and said "barbarian kyle is much stronger than regular kyle" and then went right back to puking.
I have no idea what that means but I'm googling things just so I can watch my thumbs move
I just bought a bottle of lube for my car.
How do I un-spend everything I bought last night? Seriously...was a penis shaped piñata and enough tequila to fill my bathtub really that necessary?
At least you can say you've literally dumped money down the drain
Also this morning I remembered seeing the stripper he threw up on later in the night. She was clothed though.
You said you made a new recipe, but it turned out you just cooked ramen with vodka instead of water.
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