Please forgive me. I will pay for your emergency room visit.
hey, here's something you don't have worry about since you're a girl: finding crusty cum in your bellybutton.
wtf. i just found you're porn stash.
u like it?
NOT THE POINT.
its like she was born with a silver dick in her mouth
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
yo everyone went to the hospital last night
Wow... that's disturbing man, and their not even my balls
we just plugged the camera up to the big screen. would you like to come see what you did last night, in high definition?
Drunk you is everything I aspire to be in life.
Please tell me you've ingested more than weed and Oreos today
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
IM DRINK YORE HIFH WE ARE POSTERCHOLD OF AMERICA
I'm gonna guess ur still high cus last night at like 3am my pillows were morphing into cats and I kept trying to pet them
The angle I tried to shoot a load on her face was unfortunate. I accidentally came on the David Bowie tribute she had out. Oddly, that made it more erotic.
I woke up with a twisted ankle and was covered in lube. Not entirely sure what happened last night
The prescription the hospital gave me for pain and nausea doubles for my hangovers... Maybe I'll hit up the ER more often
No, not if I told them not to. they listen to me. I have a vagina.
Randomize