everytime someone famous vagina shows up in pics, i have to go check my own vagina to make sure mine dont look all wrinkledy and flabby like that....i want my lips plump and succulent
i know, but like... i wanna be a CLASSY i'm-stealing-your-date kind of slutty...
how did you get vomit on both your shoulders. I mean think about it.
I'll be honest, not actually surprised to find half a Big Mac box and bits of broken security glass by the sofa.
she wouldn't stop crying, so we sang her to sleep. i'm guessing you will find her in the same position by the toilet in the morning. night.
He posted on my wall. Idk if I'm ready for that big of a commitment.
Yeah. I was about to call 911 but I ended up breaking the door frame off then ran and puked all the way home.
I can't stop drooling did you spike my drink?
Because you failed to stop the wedding, now I have to be a homewrecker. My eternal damnation is on your head I hope you're proud.
we're in NC now and so far we've smoked a blunt in every state with the exception of Tennessee which we accidentally went to
George disappeared two hours ago with a stripper named "delicious." Haven't seen him since
I can feel the shame as I walk down your hallway.. good night
walk of shame across osu's campus on game day. i can see all the spots i threw up last night. its like my personal yellow brick road.
We're at an agreement where I don't pry and she pretends blissful ignorance
His dick has the same name as my pipe. I'm keeping him forever.
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