i might even pee on it at walmart i am so nervous
I just bought a vibrating toothbrush with my parents FSA insurance card because I'm too broke for a vibrator. New.Level.Of.Low.
Sandwiches are there for you when porn isn't.
I've hooked up with six guys in my ethics class next semester...I feel like I've failed already
he referred to his penis as the bashful dwarf from snow white
I cannot believe this. A potential 2016 Olympiad wants my vag. To which I respond "GO FOR THE GOLD"
you have to be that girl in the audience holding up the sign that says i fucked the shit out of you
So apparently blacked out me judges a man based on what type of dinosaur he would be...
I also tried to solve my dog's itching problem with crystal healing. I'm so high, dude.
I just rubbed amethyst all over him and kept saying 'no bites.'
Maybe next year when I'm 30 I will be over puking at lunch on Fridays. Maybe
I vote we get high and sneak off to McDonald's to get mcflurries.
YES. ALL MY YES.
THERE IS A MAN IN THE BATHROOM IN COLONIAL GARB GET HERE
is it still the walk of shame if his dad gave me a 'thanks for sleeping with my son' head nod on my way out this morning?
Slowly dying because of my period and my phone is mocking me because I have 69% battery
Stupid Covid-19
The universal cock block of this decade
He was gone when I woke up. But he left skid marks on my sheets and our unopened bottle of Titos is missing
New Rule: No more sleepovers with guys we met on Reddit
Randomize
