Moan for me like Helen Keller
I still havent given him the valentines day card i got him. I feel like just writting...."sorry for the horrible blow job i gave u last night." and just giving it to him.
it appears as though my vagina has gotten the best of me again
He walked into the party with a case on one shoulder and a boom box on the other of course I fucked him
Shotgunned a beer while taking a bath.
I will now refer to my life as before and after I used Astroglide for the first time
So on how many levels of wrong is it that I'm reconsidering my divorce simply because I don't want to go through getting used to shitting around someone again.
Why would I take you home? That would eliminate the chances of you making bad decisions I could ridicule you about later.
If I just skip sleeping, does hangover still happen? Gonna try it. Will report back. StTAND BY
I'm right down the road from AJ's old house and I'm getting mixed feelings. My vagina is remembering good dick. But the rest of me is remembering horrible times.
I'm going to bed early so football can come sooner
I wish I knew the extent of my injuries before I climbed over the fence. Might have avoided the need to purchase a cupholder for my wheelchair.
in other news i got caramel vodka poured on me. upside, i smell amazing
He asked me what I wanted for Christmas. I told him an orgasm would be nice.
Just got an email from match.com trying to match me with My ex..I nearly pissed myself laughing
Randomize
