wat bout pragnant strippers??
i dont need a football game to get drunk and yell at my tv
my little brother just told me that I should start chasing my vodka with slim fast. genious.
she said shes getting her period tomorrow so she wants to have sex now. i didnt object. it would have been heartless.
ofcourse you didnt.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just threw up in my seat during the national anthem. Probably not good.
Until last night, I had never actually thrown up ON a sandwich
Just headbutted a photographer. This convention just got really interesting.
All you need to do now is invest in a Speedo and start going door to door.
You had your shirt off checking IDs at the door and you don't even work there
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I won't be able to get a boner for a month
Challenge accepted.
Your vase full of piss was still at his house and he still doesn't know.
Just realized i left my bra at his house. WHY do i suck at one night stands?!
I feel like him using the excuse "I'm not a fan of lying" to stop me from sleeping around is hypocritical since he's cheating on his wife with me.
I went to my AA meeting last night. My drug dealer is now my counselor.
Alcohol and video games. A solid Friday night. Even before covid
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