super hot butfun
Oops. What a difference a comma and a space make.
she's basically destroyed all of the faith i had that skinny blond girls could be a functioning part of society.
I just encountered the most annoying guy on the planet. I wanted to slap his milkshake out of his fat-boy hands while he was talking to me at the same time as slurping his liquid fat.
I love milkshakes.
Not the point.
Woke up to a bottle of gatorade and a packet of saltine crackers tied to underwear hanging from my ceiling fan, along with 3 advil stuck to a piece of duct tape and a note saying "have a happy hangover- <3 you/me"
Drunk you is pretty stunner.
well, the drug dealer I've been fucking the past 5 months gave me a chilis gift card for Christmas, so things are looking up.
Most senic walk of shame ever. This is why you go to school in Hawaii.
I told the cop to try walking in heels and he'd understand why I was walking home without then on. He told me he only does that on Wednesdays.
if i actually get asked out by my dealer what could happen?
i don't know, but it probably involves bathtubs full of weed
When I said tequila slammers would be the death of me, I didn't intend it to be today. Oh god.
I'm currently eating a turkey dinner, listening to xplosive by dr. Dre, and drinking rum. Hispanic christmas dinners are the best.
She has "Massive Shits" listed as a turn off. That's very specific and there's a story behind it I bet.
Sweet, got a date tomorrow night
Nothing brings compassion from a group of cafe workers like walking in and asking if they have a 'hangover special'
He's a psychology major, so instead of becoming a stripper, I'm just working out my daddy issues with him. And his cock. And spankings.
They're much more educational now btw. Don't judge.
I had to dig my own trench to puke in at the resort. That much fun.
He understood my need for pizza was more important than my need for sex. He's the one.
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